Tag: racism

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So, you wanna be a racist

Friends, from time to time Whiggy gets approached with requests for advice on how to be cool and fit in. It’s understandable. Who else would you go to for advice other than a middle-aged man who wears a powdered wig and dresses in colonial period clothing? I mean … duh! I help where and when I can. I am, afterall, not an expert on everything.

“Whiggy, how do I get the girl?”

Answer: You don’t. Flirting, asking a girl out or looking at a girl is sexual assault and will lose you your seat in congress.

“Whiggy, what is the origins of the gods in the Iliad?”

Answer: They date back to the Mycenean Period of Greece dating to the 1200’s BC.

“Whiggy, why are liberals so dumb?”

Answer: They are not really dumb. They simply live in a fantasy world devoid of authentic relationships with reality and human understanding.

“Whiggy, how do I be a racist? Everyone else is being called a racist and I am feeling left out”

you-are-racist-olzntbAnswer: This is an excellent question. First, we must clarify the word racist. There are two definitions: the classic definition and the modern definition. The classic definition of racist according to the Oxford English dictionary is: A person who shows or feels discrimination or prejudice against people of other races, or who believes that a particular race is superior to another. Slavery, not allowing African Americans to vote, not allowing African Americans to use the same facilities as Caucasians and calling African Americans by demeaning and disrespectful names are all examples for racism and being a racist. Racism has been around for all recorded history. I suspect it first started when one group of humans came upon another group of humans who looked different from them. Classic racism has led to slavery of persons of all colors. It has lead to wars. And it has led to deep divisions within geographical cultures. Racism is real. Racism has always been real. And, unfortunately, racism will always be real.

Classic racism is something to be taken seriously. It is not a laughing matter. Conversely, modern racism, as defined by the moral aristocracy, has become a joke. Hence this blog post. It is a word thrown around recklessly with astounding frequency. Unfortunately, it has taken focus away from true racism and diverted both energy and resources.

Modern racism, while tangentially related to the classic version, is a different concept. Modern racism is a weaponization of language meant to throttle disagreement with the philosophical pillars of the moral aristocracy.

With those two definitions in mind, let us get back to the question. Being a classic racist is pretty straight forward: just be a hateful, ignorant moron. However, I do not believe that is what my reader was asking. I believe he was asking how to a modern racist. That requires a slightly more nuanced answer.

There are five steps to being a modern racist:

  • Be white. According to modern racist thought, being born white makes you at least 75% racist from the onset. It’s the moral aristocracy version of Original Sin. If you are white, you are responsible for the sins of ancestors.

“Whiggy, can people who are not white be racist?” you ask.

Good question. In the United States, modern racists orthodoxy would say no. A person who is not white cannot be racist. My African American friends cannot be racist because they are victims of what their ancestors suffered and are, therefore, just evening the scales. There are exceptions to this that I will describe later. My Hispanic friends also cannot be racist. I am not sure why but I think its because they are a minority portion of American society and only those in the majority can be racists. I will have to put a team of investigators on it. My Asian friends also cannot be racist despite the light color of their skin. I have a team of investigators on that already.

  • Be a Republican or right-leaning independent. Loosely translated into the language of the moral aristocracy, Republican means “Evil racist”. A democrat cannot, by definition, be racist. Interestingly, being a Republican also changes the color of your skin. The orthodoxy of modern racism states that any African American who choses to be a Republican, instantly becomes white. Therefore, in an exception to #1, that person becomes a racist.

“But Whiggy,” you ask “What about the history of the Democratic Party? Doesn’t that matter?”

Silly, ignorant, racist reader. History does not matter when it doesn’t fit the current mythology espoused by the moral aristocracy. Sure, it was the Democrats that most supported slavery. Sure, it was the Democrats that made it their platform to have majority rule regardless of trampling on the rights of the minority. Sure, it was the Democrats that counted black slaves as 3/5 of a person. Sure, it was the Democrats that systematically wiped out the Native Americans. Sure, it was the Democrats that opposed civil rights. Sure, it was the Democrats that supported segregation. Sure, it is the Democrats that support a system that makes people of lower means increasingly reliant on the government for survival. All those things are true, but none of those things matter. History has not be revised, it has been ignored. My friends, those in the moral aristocracy cannot be and have never been racist for one reason and one reason only: Because they say so.

  • Support law enforcement. According to modern racism orthodoxy, all law enforcement is, at its core, racist. In fact, it could be argued that all laws are racist because they disproportionally enforced.

“But Whiggy, aren’t laws in place to make everyone safe?”

No, that’s racist. The moral aristocracy clearly states that all laws were put in place by white men to keep all non-whites down. Remember, you are required by the rules of the moral aristocracy to ignore all of history and the previous laws passed by democrats. Laws are disproportionally enforced on African Americans and Hispanics. Period. End of story. Therefore, if you support law enforcement, you are supporting racism and are, thus, a racist.

“But Whiggy, aren’t the laws also disproportionally broken by …”

Stop it! That’s using logic. Using logic is racist.

  • Support or Not Support African American or Hispanic artistic expressions (Republican Only Rule). It is cultural appropriation to like or create and artistic expression from any race other than your own. Cultural appropriation is racist. Likewise, it is racist to not like and support the cultural expressions of races other than your own. It shows you are close-minded and you hate anything non-white.

“But Whiggy, that makes no sense!”

Hey! Stop being racist. The moral aristocracy has said it, therefore it is so. Oh, I forgot to add one more piece. It is racist not to invest in traditionally African American or Hispanic neighborhoods. Not investing clearly shows you want to keep them down. Investing in the same neighborhoods is also racist. It leads to gentrification. Gentrification is racist.

  • Disagree with a liberal … about anything.

“Ok Whiggy, now you are just sounding crazy.”

The moral aristocracy has deemed that anyone who disagrees with their orthodoxy is a racist. This extends to any disagreement with a liberal. Read the news. If you voted for Trump, you are a racist. If you support tax reform, you are a racist. If you make Chuck Schumer cry, you are a racist.

Try it yourself. Talk to a liberal … about anything. Ask them for their opinion on a subject as far away from a race issue as you can find. There is a 96.7% chance they will call you a racist within 7 minutes. Go ahead try it. It’ll be fun. Then you will be called a racist just like everyone else who does not bow to the moral aristocracy.

So, there you have it: 5 easy steps to being a racist. And remember, Whiggy is always here for advice!

Happy racism!

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Gun Toting Midgets Riding Chocolate Goats

Friends, let us begin with a small history lesson, shall we? A long long time ago, to the land where Ted Kennedy would later kill a woman and get away scott free and where Elizabeth Warren proclaimed her indigenous credentials, there came a revolution. Soon, thirteen colonies rose, took up arms and beat back their former rulers. Key to this revolution was the act of taking up arms. The revolutionaries understood that fact. So too did the Crown. In fact, one of the first things the crown tried to do as signs of unrest became evident was to confiscate arms and gun powder. The Crown recognized that, to keep power, they needed to be the only ones armed. You see where I am going here, right?

When it came time to create the new government of The United States of America, the founding fathers understood that the government could not be the only ones with guns. The second amendment was written specifically to make sure that did not happen. It was not written so people could hunt or sport shoot. It was not written for home defense against burglars, gangs or Antifa. It was written for the sole reason to make sure the citizens could never be made completely subservient to the military of the central government. In short, the constitution keeps the stage set for another revolution when a revolution is needed.

Now lets fast forward to the world in which we live today. Tragically we have a number of batsh@t crazy, radicalized and/or evil people in the wogun controlrld. From time to time those people commit horrifying crimes. In the United States, many of these crimes are committed using guns. All people of intelligence and with a good heart can agree that these crimes are terrible and must be stopped. Unfortunately, that is where the agreement ends. As to what needs to be done to stop them, there is no agreement and there is, indeed, deeply rooted disagreement.  The loudest faction likes to blame the guns themselves for hideous murders. They instantly call for gun control because we all know that laws are 100% effective. After all, look at how well they work when it comes to drugs!

Within hours of the Las Vegas tragedy, Hillary Clinton removed her head from her rectal cavity where she has been searching for What Happened long enough to essentially blame the NRA for making the shooting happen. Soon, everyone in Moral Aristocracy climbed upon their glass pedestals and sang in unison “Gun Control, Gun Control”. When asked what specific gun control idea would have stopped this attack many slipped off their pedestals until those pedestals became firmly entrenched beside Hillary’s head. Watching the news was like watching a two-year-old argue. (I am sorry. That was offensive to two-year-olds). The arguments they did make made no sense. There was no specificity. And I am pretty sure I watched three people on the floor kicking and screaming. Since none of them could offer specifics let’s explore some of the most common gun control ideas.

Back Ground Checks: Depending on who you listen to, somewhere between 85% and 132% of American believe that background checks need to be done before someone can purchase a gun. No doubt background checks would stop all gun-related crime. The moral aristocracy would have us believe that 40% of guns purchased legally in the US are bought without a background check. According to Politifact, that claim is false and the actual number is between 14% and 22%. Certainly, most gun-related crimes are committed by people who fall into that percentage.

Actually, when researchers asked convicted criminals where they got their guns, they found something that is certain to stun us all. They found, in separate studies, that only between 3% and 11% of guns used in crimes were obtained legally! Whoa! Mind blowing isn’t it? I mean, what kind of criminal would use an illegal gun? The nerve! The audacity! Where’s Hillary? It might be time to have all these criminals suicided for not fitting her narrative. Where’s Debbie? She can have them Seth Riched.

Continuing my “fun with gun math” segment, I will use the numbers that best fit the moral aristocracy’s story: Of the 11% of the people committing crimes using legal guns, 22% did not get a background check. Using that logic, in the worst-case scenario it would be somewhat fair to say that 2.42% of all crimes committed with guns are committed by people who skirted background checks by purchasing guns privately or at gun shows. How can there be any doubt that closing the “Gun Show Loophole” would solve all gun related crimes?

Oh wait, I forgot one last little tiny detail. The Las Vegas killer (who’s name I will not utter or type) had more than 30 background checks. They all came up clean.

None of this is to say that I do not believe in background checks personally. I do. But the fact of the matter is, ensuring the extra 2.42% get checked really wont accomplish a damn thing.

So, what have we learned about background checks? 1) Most gun purchases are made with them; 2) Most criminals don’t actually buy guns legally (I’m still in shock); 3) Even with a background check, crazy @ss evil morons still get through.

Mental Health: The moral aristocracy’s narrative goes something like this: “Our mental health system is broken because we don’t have national healthcare and because republicans are all racists. If everyone took a mind-numbing drug, got therapy 23 hours a day and had a designated governmental minder to hold their hands at all times, there would be no crime at all. Additionally, no one with any sort of mental disorder should be allowed to buy a gun.” I may have paraphrased a bit but I believe I have hit all the relevant points.

I have to be honest with you, friends. This one upsets Whiggy the most. It’s the last bit. The whole concept that anyone who had a mental disorder would not be permitted to purchase a gun. Where do I start? You all know I am a former psychologist. Anyone who would suggest such a thing has no concept, whatsoever, of how mental disorders are diagnosed or treated. Let’s start with the most basic question and then move to the more worrisome concepts.

Which mental disorders would lead one to have their second amendment right taken from them? For how long would they have to suffer from it? Would they be banned for life? For how long would they have to be in recovery or symptom free before they could have their second amendment rights back? Do certain behaviors need to be associated with the diagnosis or is the diagnosis itself enough? What severity of disorder symptoms would be needed? These questions are endless and could fill volumes. One final question: when exactly did the moral aristocracy decide it was ok to discriminate against someone based on a pre-existing medical condition? BOOM! Mic drop … how you like them apples you hypocritical @sshats?!

*Pics up mic … I’m not done yet.

The aspect of this concept that most concerns me is the complete and total surrender of personal privacy to the government. For the government to deny someone’s rights based midget with gunon a pre-existing medical condition, they must be made aware of said condition. Think about that for just a minute. This would get rid of the concept of clinical confidentiality. Your government would have to be made aware, not only of your condition, but of the details of your condition. Where does that end? What other rights could they deny you based on their assessment of your mental health. And further, how long would it be until Wikileaks publishes the notes about that dream you had of that midget riding the goat covered in chocolate toting an AR15 with a melted silencer? And there’s my title!

So, what have we learned about denying a person his/her second amendment rights due to a pre-existing medical condition? The answer is in the question.

(I know this is getting long, but it needs to be said. Go pour yourself a drink. I’ll wait. Back? Ok. Let’s continue)

Ban Assault weapons: A good friend of mine and Mrs. Whiggy has the unfortunate luck of suffering from liberalism. Before the Las Vegas shooting, he was over to our house for dinner. The conversation eventually came around to guns and the concept of an assault weapon ban. My dear intellectually-deficient friend knew his liberal talking points well.

“You don’t need a semi-automatic weapon with a 30-bullet clip to hunt deer. Why does anyone NEED an assault weapon?” He said with the smugness of Harvey Weinstein defending his Clinton BFFs.

“You are right,” I responded “I don’t need it to hunt deer. I need it to assure that anyone (citizen or government official) who enters my property with intent to hurt my family or steal my treasure does not leave my property with air in his lungs or thoughts of returning in his head.”

Silence. There was no response. There could be no response. All too often, those who defend the second amendment try to use logic based on the moral aristocracy’s code. Its time for that end. I agree with those on the left that claim that assault weapons are solely intended to kill people. YES, THEY ARE. And your point is? I do not hunt. I have no interest in hunting. I’m kind of a wuss and couldn’t imagine dealing with a dead bloody deer. Anything I may own is owned expressly to remove from the earth anyone meaning to hurt me, my family or my property. Period.

Oh … and by the way: According to the FBI, there were approximately 15,000 murders in the US in 2016. About 10,600 of those were committed using guns. Data is not available yet for 2016 but in 2014 about 70% of those guns were handguns. 2% involved rifles and assault weapons. Yes, that right. I said 2%.

And one more by the way: the constitution grants gun ownership as a right, not as a means of meeting a need and only if that need is present. Oh, and the intent was of the second amendment was to ensure that the citizenry could stay armed in case the need arises to defend against the government. So, there’s that.

So, what have we learned about an assault weapon ban? Like the whole Background Check red herring, banning assault weapons would impact approximately 2% of murders. Then there is that pesky little fact that the constitution makes gun ownership a right. A small side note: Neither health care nor education are mentioned as rights by the constitution yet gun ownership is. Interesting.

I could go on and on about other concerns such as magazine capacities, types of ammunition, types of sights, gun licensure and weapon modifications but I think I have gone on long enough.

I want to leave you with this thought: the deadliest domestic terrorist attack in the US involved a truck and tons of fertilizer and killed 168 people. Where there is a sick will, there is a sick way.

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Multi-Millionaire Defecation Nuggets on their Knees

Friends, as you know, I am a huge fan of the New England Patriots. I have been a fan of the New England Patriots for as long as I can remember. I look forward to the NFL every year as I struggle through the dark days of those other sports. I find baseball as boring as watching Al Gore speak on just about anything. The NBA lost its soul in the 90’s and are represented by the biggest snowflake of all, Lebron “My skills” James. The NHL is cool but it has been put through the snowflake filter resulting in a game of fluffy flag hockey. And the MLS is … well soccer.

I wait for the NFL all year long. I read everything I can on a weekly basis during the off-season. I even watched the CFL that one time. As an example of my level of obsession, I flew to Atlanta the Friday before the Superbowl in February for the express reason to jinx the Falcons because it had worked for the previous two years. Yup, I have that much of an issue.

Sunday afternoons during the NFL season are a time to abandon my children, ignore my friends and swear at my TV. My mother taught me that screaming at the TV is an effective way of making a difference. Oh crap! I think my mom may have been the original Antifa! The only thing I think is football. The only things I protest are bad calls against my beloved Pats (all the calls against them are bad). The only hate I have in my heart if for whatever team they are playing. And the Jets. I always hate the Jets. And Roger Goodell. But that goes without saying. I don’t think about politics. I don’t want to think about politics. I don’t want my pastor to talk about politics in church and I don’t want my team to talk about politics … ever.

And then along came Colin Kaepernick and cast a shadow over my day of beauty. Let’s examine him for a moment: He would want you to believe that, as a black man, he understands the plight of the oppressed. That poor man has been to hell and back all because of his skin is black (Pretty cool rhyme there huh?). Except he hasn’t. He was raised by an upper-middle class white family in Wisconsin before moving to California. He was always a great athlete and received all the respect and accolades that go with it. 20170924_153024No, he became a radical douche only after his career started collapsing. He, no doubt, has talent and athleticism, but like so many young QBs that lose in the Superbowl, he choked thereafter. After that loss, and the loss of a hard-ass coach that made the snowflakes cry, he fell apart. Only then did he decide to stand up for criminals who were shot by police (I’ll write about that concept at some point). The spoiled little snowflake decided that the best way to help his fellow oppressed was to kneel during the anthem and insult the very country that made his success possible. Soon he was joined by others, some of whom actually had experienced oppression but seemed to forget they live in a country where they get paid millions to play a game regardless of their color.

The press had epic multiple orgasms. Everyone forgot that Kaepernick choked as a player and could not be relied upon to help his team win. They did everything possible to keep the issue alive. When Kaepernick was not picked up by another team, they openly questioned if it had to do with his political stance. That poor man was a true martyr to his cause. Rosa Parks had nothing on him. Then the new season started and the whole thing started up again. Even 8-year-olds were taking a knee. They had no idea why, but their parents wanted to feel important.

Fast forward to this week. President Trump decided to shine his bright spotlight on the issue in a way only he could. Snowflakes everywhere had orgasmic-tantrums (a new term created by Whiggy – you are welcome). For the first time in history, the liberal moral aristocracy displayed full-throated support for …. The One Percent. Yup – they truly stand for what they believe in … this week.

Side note: I must be honest, I wish the President had not said anything in this case. As one of my very close friends stated “(the issue) was trending in a positive direction”. Very few players were kneeling. Kaepernick is sitting at home. Americans were not responding well to parents having their 8-year-olds kneel. The President brought the issue back into the brightest spotlight it has seen to date. One thing I learned in my long career working with children is that they best reaction to a tantrum is to lower your voice and speak to them so quietly that they must stop to hear you. Sometimes the best way to deal with the tantrum is to simply ignore it. You’d be surprised how well both of those tactics work. The President, while correct in his words, gave them the attention they needed to continue and even expand their little snowflake fit. The toddlers are kneeling today, not because of alleged police brutality or racism, but because they want to make a stand against Trump. Sometimes you just have to let the children scream it out. They’ll get tired, grab a bo-bo and take a nap. Back to the issue.

Today I am disappointed by the game I love to watch. The NFL owners, worried about losing money, chose the wrong side and chose it fast. Guess what billionaires? More of your customers support Trump and the American Flag than your unpatriotic spoiled brats. Then the games started. First up were the Jags and the Ravens. Many of these multi-millionaire spoiled rotten little defecation-nuggets (new term, feel free to use it to your delight) knelt during our anthem but stood during the British anthem. I wonder how quickly the President can expand on the travel-ban. I am sure they can all make their millions in Europe. Then the pre-game shows started. More millionaires paid to talk about sports throwing little tantrums. Is them afwaid them’s little friends may get them’s feewings hurt?

And then the “players show of unity” began for the 1:00 games. For those teams that stood with their arms interlocked, I say bravo. 20170924_153218Thank you for making your point while still showing respect for the flag. I am not sure what point you are making, but at least you are making it respectfully. By the way, do you know what point you are making?  For those who knelt (almost half of my own beloved team), you are a disgrace. Please take your millions and leave this country. I am sure you will all be able to find jobs in other countries with those degrees “you earned”. Then you can kneel in front of anyone you want. I am sure you can make money that way. You are replaceable. There are plenty of Americans who would work harder and appreciate the opportunity to make a fortune playing a game. For the Patriots that knelt, you are not worthy to wear the name.

“But Whiggy, this is America. We have freedom of speech. They have a right to kneel.” You are saying.

I agree. They have the right to kneel. They have the right to protest all they want. I have rights as well. I have the right to point out that they are whiny little defecation-nuggets. I have the right to turn off my TV. I have the right to boycott every company that advertises on the NFL. I have the right to organize a vagina march and burn down all NFL stadiums. Oh wait. I’m not a part of the liberal moral aristocracy, I don’t get to do that last part.

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Mini-Whiggy Questions DACA

Mini-Whiggy came home yesterday with a question:

“Dada, what is daka, or deca or dacow?” he queried.

I smiled at his innocence, patted him on the head and started to explain.

“Well, Mini-Whiggy Dachau was a place during World War II where Hitler sent people to be killed because he was an evil man. But you mean DACA. Although, lots of crazy people want to pretend they are the same thing.”

“You mean liberals?” he asked. God, I love that kid!

“Yes buddy, liberals. DACA is kinda hard to explain though. I am not sure you’ll understand.”

“Dada, I am pretty smart. I taught you and Mama how to use Minecraft.”

“Good point. Ok. So, you know that our government has three parts that we call branches. They each have their own chores. The Legislative Branch is made up of the House and the Senate. Their chore is to make laws. The Executive Branch is made up of the President, the Vice President and a bunch of people who work for the President. Their chore is to carryout laws. They make up the rules for how to make people follow the laws. Then there is the Judicial branch.  It is made up of the Supreme Court and a bunch of other judges. Their chore is to interpret laws and …”

Branches_US_gov“Ummm. I know all this already. Remember you used to read me the constitution every night when I was three?” he interrupted.

“I am sorry Buddy,” I apologized, “Sometimes I forget that, even though you are only seven, you are smarter than a lot of people”

“You mean liberals?”

“Yes buddy. So, back to DACA. A long time ago Congress passed laws about how people are allowed to move to the United States. They made a bunch of rules that people had to follow. If they followed those rules, they could come to the United States and someday become Americans.” I explained. “Then, our last President …”

“You mean Obama?”

“Yes …” I replied.

“Remember that time when people said he could be President again and you cried, and drank lots of your adult juice and told me all about how some people could fit their heads in their butts? That was funny.” He added giggling.

“Yes. Yes, I do remember that. But let me explain more” I said, “So, Obama decided that he didn’t like parts of the law. Then he told the people who work for him to make new rules that would ignore part of the law for a little while.”

“Why did he do that Dada?” He asked.

“Well, for a few reasons.” I began to explain “First, Obama liked to make everything about what color people were because it helped him get lots of votes. It also got lots of people who think like him lots of votes too.”

“You mean puppets?” Damn, this kid is awesome!

“Yes. But they like to call themselves Democrats or even Progressives…”

“You mean like Flo on TV? She is funny.”

“No. That’s a different Progressive. So anyway, there was an election coming and Obama wanted to help more people who think like him get elected. By ignoring parts of the law, he thought he could make lots of people happy and they would vote for his friends. Second, even though he pretended to be a teacher of the Constitution, didn’t really understand it. He thought the President was a king and could do whatever he wanted. Third, Obama hated America the way it was. He wanted to make a new America.”

“What kind of America did he want?” He asked with rapt attention.

“Oh buddy,” I explained with the care and compassion only a dad can know, “You are not old enough for that part of the story. It is very scary and you need to be able to sleep tonight.”

“OK, Dada.” He conceded “So why is everyone so mad now about DACA. Teacher was crying in school.”

“Well Mini-Whiggy, yesterday President Trump …”

“Remember when people made him president and you laughed and laughed so hard that you peed? That was funny and gross.” He reminded me.

“Yes, it was.” I started my explanation again. “Yesterday President Trump told the people who worked for him that they have to follow the law. Because some people don’t like the law, he gave Congress six months to make a new law if they want to.”

“Wow!” He exclaimed “Six months is a long time. In six months, I will be 8 years-old and the Patriots will have another Superbowl Trophy.”

“That’s very true! But, Congress spends so much time stealing money from people and calling the President names that getting anything done in six months may be impossible.”

“So” He began to summarize, “Congress made a law that people are supposed to listen to. President Obama didn’t like the law so he ignored parts of it. Then President Trump told people they have to follow the law or make a new one. Now lots of people are mad that they have to follow a law that they were supposed to follow anyway?”

“Yup.” I agreed. See the seven year old gets it!

“That’s stupid.” He stated plainly with the wisdom of Socrates.

“Yes, it is Little Man. Yes, it is.”

“Dada, I have one more question. Why are you calling me Mini-Whiggy?”

“Because this is a blog. Its not a real conversation. It’s make believe.”

“Oh” he said, “Like liberal tolerance?”

“Yes buddy. Exactly like liberal tolerance.” I have the greatest kid in the world.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A letter to the Moral Aristocracy

Dear Moral Aristocracy,

I would like to start with a heartfelt thank you. If it were not for you, the United States may now be suffering under the imperial rule of Hillary Clinton. Thank you for ensuring that tragedy did not happen. Confused? I’ll explain. If it weren’t for your decades of telling everyone how to live, what to eat, what not to eat, what words to use, what words not to use, how to raise our children, what games our children can play, what humor is acceptable and on and on there would not have been the groundswell of anger that lead to the Trump presidency.

You started innocently enough with trying to cleanse certain words from our language that most would agree are offensive. Then you went a little farther with moronically trying to change words we’ve used for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Freshman became first year student. Woman became womyn. Moron became liberal. You get the idea. In all your historical ignorance, you decided to call it Politically Correct. The not so subtle message being that, if anyone dared say something that did not fit your ever-changing mold, that person would be “incorrect”. I long for the innocent days when I was only incorrect. Now anyone who strays from the party line is a Nazi, evil, the antichrist or any other number of historically inaccurate comparisons.

Yocommunismu have now graduated on to full on Communist social engineering. “You are doing the same thing by calling us Communists” you are thinking together with your collective Borg-like hivemind.

I agree, with one minor exception. My depiction actually fits the historical record. Do you know from where the term “political correct” derives? Of course you don’t, MSNBC and CNN hasn’t told you yet. It comes from 1930’s Soviet Union.  People understood there were two “realities” at the time. There was what actually was happening and what the communist government wanted people to believe. Therefore, there was what was correct and what was politically correct. Sounds a lot like today. There is what happens in the world and there is what you and your media wants everyone to think is happening. Like the soviet communists, you too want to engineer a social hegemony where you set the rules for everyone’s behavior.

You were doing well for quite a while there too. You controlled congress for 40 some odd years. You developed social programs that drove people to become reliant on the government for their very survival. More people rely on the government now than at any time in our history. Not long after, you gained intellectual control of our education system. Around the same time, you gained intellectual control over the media.

Enough of us started catching on that you could no longer rely on control of congress. Your domination started to wane. Ronald Reagan showed there was a way to be successful without sucking on the teat of government. Suddenly people didn’t need the government. Your response? Full on political correctness. Perhaps you could not completely control government anymore but you could continue to manipulate how people thought and behaved through the media, Hollywood and professorial dictates. Colleges taught us politically correct from wrong and the media covered only what fit your picture of the world. You were making tremendous progress. Once again political and intellectual hegemony were in sight. Then you reached your pinnacle. Your great savior the Obamination was elected in a frenzy of blind political correctness. You and he had control of congress again. You passed the second largest piece of citizen control legislation. Now you control the very health care system that people relied on to survive. Certainly nothing could stop you. But there was a slight wrinkle that you didn’t see in all your historical ignorance.

You see, non-liberals have this annoying thing called free will. I understand that you are unfamiliar with the concept but freewill allows us to think for ourselves and make our own decisions. We get ever so slightly annoyed when you try to assimilate us into your Borg-like mindshare cult. We are big boys and girls (notice the mention of only two genders). We like thinking for ourselves. Sure, it’s a more difficult way of living than yours. Thinking can be hard. You should try it. I bet, that if your tried really hard and practiced for a few years you would like it. Like the citizens of almost every communist government in history, we fought back. Had you not ignored history, you would have seen it coming.

In the years since the Obamination’s coronation we won quite a few skirmishes. We took back the House, the Senate, most of the governor seats and the majority of state governments. The news organization that was most watched is one that is not part of your hive. The most listened to talk radio hosts have not been assimilated. Through all this you did not learn. You didn’t notice the signs because you chose only to see what you want to see.

You put everything into the 2016 election.  Certainly, we would all conform by crowning Hillary Clinton. Undoubtedly your hegemony would be established at last and would be the 1000-year Reich.  After all, you are politically correct.

But then Donald Trump happened. He represented all that you are not. No, openly opposed all that stand for. He was not only politically incorrect, but he flaunted it. He openly called out your attempts at social domination. While you still spoke of the hive he spoke of the needs and desires of the individual worker bee. While you told everyone how they should think and behave, he showed them that they could behave anyway they liked. In short, he took your social engineering playbook and bitch-slapped you with it and then lit it on fire. On November 8th Trump led us to our biggest battle victory of this war for control of the populace you started decades ago. The game had changed. The rules had changed.

And what was your response? Did you learn from your mistakes? Did you realize that you had to scale back your goal of a great American communist state? Nope. You brought doubling down to a whole new level. You threw tantrums like 2-year olds who needed their binkies. You went from the paragons of political correct behaviors to common rioting thugs. You went from trying to legislate historical revisionism to literally demolishing history. As your movement is in its death throes you have become the despots that originally defined your movement. When people won’t assimilate, intimidate.

But keep it up. The more you tantrum, the more our numbers grow. Every time one of you sheds crocodile tears, another patriot is born. Every time you destroy a piece of American history, another patriot is born. Every time you don an oh so appropriate vagina hat, another patriot is born. Every time you call for the impeachment of the President, another patriot is born. Every time you call people with whom you disagree a Nazi, another patriot is born. Every time you burn an American city because you don’t get what you want, another patriot is born.

So, go ahead, keep fighting. Just remember, there are more of us and while you have been eating your gluten-free snowflake vegan hope nuggets in your safe spaces we have been working, learning and preparing for victory.

With any DUE respect,

 

Whiggy

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Gluten-Free Rainbow Lollipop Land

I saw something yesterday that touched my heart and completely changed my mind about the airbrushing of American history. I turned on the news and watched helplessly as several TV commentators, most notably the virtuous and trustworthy Van Jones, wept in response to President Trump’s condemnation of hate by both sides and his call for unity (that horrible racist puppy killing Nazi). I too was brought to tears at this display. Granted my tears were of a mirthful and mocking nature but they were tears nonetheless. Then I had an epiphany. We can change history! Together we can undo all the wrongs wrought by our forefathers (not our foremothers, they were women and therefore could do no wrong). After all, we are to blame for events that transpired hundreds, if not thousands, of years before our birth. I know these things because the great Holy Man Alfred Charles Sharpton told me so.

My friends. My country…men…women…trans…CISs .. umm. Oh screw-it … my fellow carbon-based life elements, let us rise together and undue the crimes of our past for which we are wholly responsible! Let us not stop at a measly few confederate statues. Oh no. Like the great socialists that came before us, Stalin, Lenin, Mao and Hitler, let us destroy any vestige of what came before us that does not fit our current view of Utopia free of white men and anyone who identifies as their oppressive birth gender. I propose the following revisions and reversions:

  • All statues, monuments, parks and museums having to do with slavery must be torn down today. May I suggest we save taxpayer money and let the highly motivated millennials do the demolition? We can pay them with Fidget Spinners.
  • Arlington National Cemetery must be bulldozed. Arlington sits on land previously owned by Robert E. Lee. His house still stands there. Also, there are confederate soldiers buried there. May I suggest the land be used as the home of the cultural movement of our time: Occupy (insert the hate of the day here)?
  • The names of Washington state and the District of Columbia must be changed. Washington was a slave owner and therefore a disgrace to all that is good. May I suggest we call them Gluten-Free Rainbow Lollipop Land and Gluten-Free Rainbow Lollipop Land SS (Safe Space)?
  • The name of Pennsylvania must also be changed. William Penn was a slave owner and therefore a worthless pariah to history. May I suggest the name be changed to Clintopia?
  • All statues of, historical mentions of and major legislation (see what I did there?) signed by FDR must be forthwith eliminated. FDR ordered internment camps during World War II. May I suggest his memorial be replaced with one for the peace-loving Che Guevara?
  • Mount Rushmore will need to be renovated. May I suggest we replace the faces of Washington (slave owner), Jefferson (rapist slave owner) and Roosevelt (Indian killer) with great utopian socialists? While not American, we cannot doubt the Omnipotent State Utopias created by Stalin, Mao and Hitler were indeed places of peace and love. They understood that government knew best and could ensure that everyone was treated equally.
  • All railroads must be torn up immediately. The railroads were largely built by Chinese immigrants forced into labor, treated poorly and paid less than $15 an hour. May I suggest the railroads be replaced with bike lanes with Citybike kiosks added every half mile?
  • The state of Maine must be returned to Massachusetts and the state of Missouri must become an unorganized territory. Both were part of the Missouri Compromise, which only propagated slavery. No further suggestion here. (feel free to add your suggestion in the comments)
  • All US Cities must be immediately disbanded. It has been an undisputed fact that evil white meat and gluten eating men forced former slaves from their plantations and packed them into cities in a 200 year plan to keep them subjugated, underprivileged and poorly educated. May I suggest that each of the 45 million or so African Americans, all of whom are still victims of slavery, be given 10 acres of federal land?
  • The democrat party must be disbanded immediately. They have a history of supporting slavery and creating the KKK. May I suggest it be replaced with the ultimate goal of socialism, the Borg?

 

Wait! What the hell am I thinking? I am sorry. Please excuse my ignorance. I am missing the root of the problem. We can solve all our problems with two very simple solutions:

  • There were relatively few black people in the colonies before the slave trade. Since every single African American today is here, and an object of cultural subjugation, due to that slave trade we must reverse it. It seems only logical that all African Americans should be liberated of the “American” and returned to their glorious homelands.

Oh calm down! Don’t call me a racist. I’m not done yet. Damn it Van Jones, stop crying! You aren’t even reading this. Uh Oh, I hear peaceful protesters approaching my house. Are those flamethrowers? I said … LET ME FINISH!

  • When the original evil white colonists arrived from Europe they murdered the peaceful indigenous people, destroyed the lands and raped the native fauna. This land cannot reach its Utopian ideal unless all those of European heritage (i.e. evil white devils) are purged from the land. Therefore, logic dictates that white people of privilege (i.e all evil white devils) be returned to Europe.

Problem solved for all sides! Uh Oh, I said all sides. Here come the peaceful protesters again. Are those gluten-free hybrid chainsaws?

 

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The Media: The Most Dangerous Hate Group in America

I believe subtlety and nuance are vital in proper political discourse. Oh wait. No, I don’t. The most dangerous hate-group in America is the mainstream media. OH NO HE DIDN’T!!! Oh yes I did!

 

I am sorry, do you think that statement is too hyperbolic? Surely, you suggest, the KKK, White Supremacists, Alt Right, Alt Left, Antifa, BLM and anyone living in San Francisco pose a greater danger. After all they have rioted. They have burned buildings. They have destroyed property. They have sent dissenters to the hospital. They have killed civilians and police alike. How can there be doubt that they are the most dangerous hate-groups in America? Let’s explore shall we?

There can be no doubt that the above-named groups are violent and/or dangerous. A simple review of pictures and videos on social media of their behaviors during their “peaceful demonstrations” will prove that point.  However, these people represent a small fraction of the populace. Even the Million-Vagina March (That was the name of it right?) represented on a tiny portion of Americans. More important than whom they represent, these groups can only directly influence an infinitesimal number of people with whom they have direct contact. That said, their influence can be magnified beyond reasonable measure by the media. By that measure, the Alt Left, Antifa, BLM and Pelosi Supporters are more dangerous than the others because they are glorified by the media making their behavior increasingly socially acceptable.

Lest we believe concern about the media is a new thing brought on by the evil Donald Trump and his racist, sexist, baby-eating and puppy killing minions, let’s look at what a couple others have said: Thomas Jefferson said “Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper. Truth itself becomes suspicious by being put into that polluted vehicle”. Alexander Hamilton said “It is the Press which has corrupted our political morals. Theodore White, A journalist in the 60’s and 70’s, summed up the power of the press best when he said “the power of the press in America is a primordial one. It sets the agenda of public discussion; and this sweeping political power is unrestrained by any law. It determines what people will talk and think about …”. To sum up, the media is an unrestrained power that determines what people will talk and think about. Unrestrained. Not only are they unrestrained but they are unbalanced, I mean imbalanced. Actually, they are both. They are imbalanced because the clear majority of the mainstream media represent a single political ideology. By any measure, any poll and any research done, today’s American media leans so far left that it topples over into a cartwheel and continues going ad infinitum.  With what does this leave us? An unrestrained and untrustworthy power determining the American zeitgeist with little to no counter-balance. Can there be any question that the mainstream media is the most dangerous group in America?

But Whiggy (can you think of a better nickname?), you say, you said they were a hate group? How can you say that? They don’t march, they don’t riot and they don’t spout hateful speech. Admittedly, I will get more pushback on this point than any other. Hate is a very strong word to be sure. However, how else would you define any group that covers someone negatively 80% of the time (90% when you subtract Fox News) according to several sources, notably the Harvard Kennedy’s Shorenstein Center on Media, Politics and Public Policy? Their hate is not as vulgar as the KKK and Nazi groups proudly displaying symbols of hate and racism. Its not as blatant as the Alt Left and Pelosi minions burning buildings and publicly beating people with whom they disagree. Their hate isn’t chanted in the streets like the Black Lives Matter “What do we want? Dead Cops! When do we want it? Now.” No. Their hate is far dastardlier (cool word – spellcheck liked it more than “more dastardly”). Its ubiquitous. It pervades everything they do. Their hate is best shown in their dearth of any balanced or neutral coverage and their complete acceptance of anything the Moral Aristocracy says without any journalistic skepticism. They have presented the left’s stance as orthodoxy. You are either evil or stupid if you believe otherwise.

There can be no doubt that the mainstream media hates this President. They promote false storylines of fake crimes. They give the bully pulpit to people full of hate who call the President a liar, a Nazi, evil and stupid. The bend and edit his words to further support that picture. They glorify acts of violence as a means of expressing disagreement with him. They outright call anyone who supports him racist and evil. Said bluntly: the media has constructed a zeitgeist of hatred for a President, his supporters and anyone who disagrees with the liberal left.

 “Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media.” – Noam Chomsky

I ask, who else is a more dangerous hate group?

 

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I’ll be right back …gotta riot

Preamble Disclaimer:

First, I want to make perfectly clear that hate-based violence is unacceptable in any form. What happened in Charlottesville is tragic and inexcusable. With no equivocation, I condemn any group with hate at their core and/or who uses violence as a means to promote their demagoguery. My following thoughts in no way condone the violence associated with it.

(I have been inflicted with Mass Psychosis Disorder and am therefore disproportionately and nonsensically outraged! Read in a high pitched sanctimonious voice trembling in outrage, fear and grief)

Did you see the President’s hate filled and racists words? Twenty minutes before the tragic death in Charlottesville, VA our President deliberately stoked the flames of racism, sexism, homophobia, anti-Semitism and animal cruelty. Did you see his words? Let me read them to you: “We ALL must be united & condemn all that hate stands for. There is no place for this kind of violence in America. Let’s come together as one!”.  Can you believe that? How can you read that as anything but hate? And notice this tweet came out twenty minutes BEFORE the killing by his number one supporter, hidden campaign manager and secret vice-president! (I’ll be right back …. Ok I am back. I had to go burn down my neighbor’s house for daring to have a one-dollar bill in his wallet. The one-dollar bill has George Washington on it. Washington had slaves and therefore is a symbol of hatred and racism and as such needs to be completely airbrushed from history.)

Trump did not stop his detestable behavior there. Eighty minutes after the tragedy (might as well have been 80 days like Bush’s response to Katrina) he further supported hate when he said: “… But we’re closely following the terrible events unfolding in Charlottesville, Va. We condemn in the strongest possible terms this egregious display of hatred, bigotry and violence on many sides, on many sides. It’s been going on for a long time in our country. Not Donald Trump, not Barack Obama. This has been going on for a long, long time. It has no place in America. What is vital now is a swift restoration of law and order and the protection of innocent lives. No citizen should ever fear for their safety and security in our society. And no child should ever be afraid to go outside and play or be with their parents and have a good time...” (I’ll be right back …Ok I am back. I had to go burn down my other neighbor’s house. He didn’t do anything wrong but I am really upset. What else was I supposed to do?) Can you believe THAT LEVEL OF RACISM? “Violence on many sides, on may sides” Why did he say it twice? We all know two negatives make a positive. Follow me here. By saying “many sides” twice, he obviously means ONE SIDE. And we all know that the most famous “Side” is the Dark Side … the Dark Side is BLACK! GOD DAMN RACIST SONOFABITCH! And we know when he condemns “hatred, bigoty and violence” he really means “I eat babies”. See, he admitted it and no one seems to care! We have to stop this Russian spy! (I’ll be right back ….)

I gotta be honest, that felt good. Is that what it is like to be a liberal? You get to feign outrage, ignore facts and burn down your neighbors’ houses? No wonder they like it. (Disclaimer: no neighbor’s house was harmed during this blog.)

 

I do not want to pontificate too long on this but I have to make at least one point. A woman was tragically killed and the Moral Aristocracy has focused on nothing but the fact that the President did not explicitly call out white supremacists, the KKK and other racists. They do not care about Heather Heyer. They only care about propagating the hate against President Trump. Now, while I personally wish he would have named the hate groups on both sides, he still made a call for peace and unity while condemning all hate. Where was the outrage when our previous president blamed police for arresting too many African Americans as well as guns themselves for the Dallas Police shootings? Where was the outrage when that same president constantly and consistently stoked the fires of racism?  There were protests and riots across the country last night and they will, no doubt, continue for the days to come. What are these protests about? The puppets of the Moral Aristocracy are rioting because the President of the United States ccondemned hate from all sides and called for unity. Let that sink in.