Hypocritical Cow-Napping and Liberal Moral Decrepitude

Friends, Whiggy has made his fair share of poor decisions. I haven’t always behaved in a way I would like my children to behave. Let me share an example: One time in college, I decided that my dorm suffered from an extreme bovine deficiency. In order to rectify the situation, I decided to liberate a cow from my university’s farm in the ag program. The liberation did not go well at first. The cow I chose, I will call her Hillary for the purposes of this story, had a bit of a Theon Greyjoy moment and did not want to leave. After a long discussion of bovine rights and systemic subjugation, I convinced her to follow me up to my dorm. Back then, “see something, say something” had not yet been coined and therefore, everyone who saw something, waved and offered me adult beverages but said nothing to the authorities. Whiggy was a Poli-Sci/English major back then. Had I been a math or science major I may have realized that a full-grown cow could not fit through the singlewide door in the back of my dorm. After several attempts and a few more adult beverages, I gave up and decided that my Bovine Liberation Society would be short lived. I subtly made sure a friend of mine in the Ag program knew about the cow by running down her hall screaming “The cows are coming; the cows are coming”. It was important to me to ensure Hillary would be returned by someone more able and sober than I. I mean, I did all that work to free her and get her up the hill. I wasn’t about to return her too. Geesh, I can’t do everything!”

“Whiggy,” you are saying right about now “you are doing it again. Can you get to the point and tell us why you are telling us this story?”

Indeed, I will. But first let me tell you what I learned from this experience: absolutely nothing. Well, expect that cows are fat and don’t fit through human sized doors. I paid no consequence. I got a ton of laughs. And I was legend on campus for about a week (although that may be only in my head). But here is the thing: I knew then that what I was doing, while funny as hell, was wrong. I know now that it was wrong. If I heard a story of someone doing something similar today, I could not stand on my high horse, call PETA and excoriate that person for animal cruelty … or cownapping … or racism. I would be a hypocritical ass. See where I am going now?

Kidding aside, there are a number of morally dubious decisions I have made in my life that I would not dare to judge someone else on if they made a similar decision. Any decently honest person should feel the same. That is not so say that you cannot learn from your mistakes and try to pass that learning on to others. Rest assured, my daughters know that cows cannot fit into singlewide doors and will, most likely, not attempt to recreate my hilarious folly.

This brings me to my main point: I call the liberal elite class the Moral Aristocracy because they have taken the role of the moral majority over the past few decades. They decide what is morally acceptable based on the direction of the wind on any given day. If you do not agree with what they say, you are evil. Notice I said, “what they say” and not what they do. Liberals have long ignored the behaviors of the compatriots. Words matter – behaviors are ignored. Let’s look at a few examples, shall we?

One of my favorite examples of liberal hypocrisy is the Lion of the Senate himself, Edward ‘Ted’ Kennedy. Lest anyone forget, Teddy killed a woman. He left a party with Mary Jo Kopechne, drove his car off a bridge and swam to safety as she drown in the car. Oh wait, there is more.  He returned to his hotel and went to bed. In the morning he called his friends for advice, went back to the scene and then, 10 hours later, reported it. What deep penalty did he pay? How did the moral aristocracy judge him? He received a 2-month suspended sentence and couldn’t run for president for 10 more years. That’s it. Worse yet, he became the symbol of the Democrat party over the next few decades. He was dubbed the Lion of the Senate. Anyone who was anyone attended his funeral. He was laid to rest in Arlington Cemetery. Not bad for a remorseless killer.

William Jefferson Clinton (I wonder if his name will be protested), the 42^nd President of the United States has been accused rape and sexual assault for much of his career. Like so many famous men, he has denied these claims while paying settlements to make many of them go away. Rapey McPotus, at the age of 49, had an affair in the White House with a 23-year-old intern and then perjured himself in a court of law during a what? A lawsuit for his rape of another woman. This affair included oral sex while ordering a military bombing and a deeply disturbing misuse of a cigar. His wife went on to attack his accusers. What deep penalty did this savior of the Democrat party pay? Well, if he had an actual soul, he would have been humiliated publicly for months. That was not the case. He was only the second President impeached yet not removed from office. Instead he was censured. He went on to earn hundreds of millions of dollars for speeches to donors to his foundation.

Politicians are not the only members of the left moral aristocracy to display deeply disturbing behavior while suffering little to know consequences. The Hollywood elite are the darlings of the Democrat party as well as its major benefactors. The paragons of the Hollywood left bring a whole new level of depravity. Roman Polanski raped a 13-year-old girl, made a plea bargain and then fled the country. He has since be accused of rape no less than four times. Surely Hollywood would reject him! Nope, he has since made millions directing movies. He has been nominated for several Oscars and his movies have won eight. Actors from Johnny Depp to Whoopi Goldberg have defended him. When he was named Best Director at the Oscars he got a standing ovation. Woody Allen, Hollywood resident genus, married his girlfriend’s adopted daughter with whom he was having an affair. Sounds rather “Hollywood” right? Slight problem: Soon-Yi was a teenager when they started their affair. Further, he was, no doubt a father figure to her. He was also accused of sexual assault of his girlfriend’s son. What terrible price did he pay? Since the affair came to light he has made countless movies, been nominated for eight Oscars and won one. And our newest High Hollywood Hypocrite … Harvey Weinstein: facts are still coming out on this one. This much is clear: He is a sad pathetic man who got off on masturbating in front of those who were powerless before him, all the while extoling the virtues of the liberal elite and raising millions for them. How was he judged by the moral aristocracy? He wasn’t – for thirty years! Only now will we find out if he’ll pay any penalty.

These examples shine a spotlight, not only on depraved sick men but on the complete and pervasive hypocrisy of the left. Kennedy was lauded as a liberal god. Clinton is a democrat savior and great man. Polanski and Allen are creative geniuses and paragons of liberal virtue. Weinstein was a political and industry powerbroker until it caught up with him. And now all the woman, who railed against the President publicly are seen as brave for coming forward decades later after they have made their millions and, lest we forget, after so many others were allowed to suffer at his hand. Hillary, the political relic not the cow (ummm…), is the poster child for this hypocrisy. She did everything she could to destroy the lives of her husband-of-political-convenience’s accusers. Then she said all women’s allegations must be taken seriously. Then she attacked the women who accused her husband again while accusing Donald Trump of misogyny and male-evil. Then she stood as the defender of all women while feeling entitled to all their votes. All the while, she took money from her great friend Harvey who was a well know serial-sexual harasser.

“But Whiggy, certainly the republicans have their fair share of inappropriate behaviors?”

Very true. No one is without sin. This submission is not about the sin, but about the hypocrisy. Republicans are quick to discard of members, even leaders, when similar allegations come to light. Larry Craig was caught doing some unsavory things in a men’s room – He resigned. John Ensign resigned after admitting an affair. Chris Lee send pics to a woman on Craigslist, got caught and resigned. Herman Cain stopped running for President after allegations were made of sexual harassment. Denny Hastert, that sick bastard, was instantly shunned by Republicans once it came to light that he was a pedophile. Liberals surround each other with protection and excuses when they get caught. Conservatives either quit or are forced to walk the plank.

My mother used to say that she never trusted the words of anyone. “Only their actions tell the truth” she would say. The Moral Aristocracy spends an inordinate amount of time telling us all the proper way to live and think. Their words establish their stance at the top of the moral high ground. Their actions betray something far more sinister. They protect child rapists as long as they donate to their cause. They venerate men who use power to subjugate women sexually as long as they support the progressive cause. Their silence allows women to be continually victimized so they can continue to make money, get donations and claim power. They continue to criticize the behaviors of others, all the while setting a new standard for amorality. The have descended from the moral high ground to moral decrepitude. The only sin left in the liberal world is disagreement with their party line.